When Fear Is Present
Fear can be present without being in charge.
"When I am afraid, I put my trust in you." — Psalm 56:3
There's something I really appreciate about this verse.
David doesn't say, "I am never afraid."
He says, "When I am afraid."
That seems important to notice.
Sometimes, we talk about fear as if feeling it means something is wrong with our faith.
If I really trusted God, I wouldn't be afraid.
If my faith were stronger, this wouldn't bother me.
If I prayed enough, the fear would disappear.
But Scripture shows us a much more honest picture.
David knew fear.
The disciples knew fear.
Moses knew fear.
Elijah knew fear.
People who trusted God still had times when their circumstances made them afraid.
The difference wasn't really about whether they felt fear.
It was about what they chose to do when fear showed up.
Maybe that's a better question for us, too.
Not:
"How do I make sure I'm never afraid?"
But:
"When fear shows up, what will I do with it?"
Fear Has a Voice
Fear can feel overwhelming.
It tells us things like:
Don't try.
Don't trust.
Don't speak.
Don't go.
Don't change.
Don't risk it.
Stay where you are. At least here, you know what to expect.
Sometimes, fear even sounds reasonable.
It can list out everything that might go wrong.
It reminds us of what happened before.
It points out every reason we might not be qualified.
If we're not careful, fear can shift from something we feel to the voice that makes our decisions.
That difference matters.
Feeling afraid doesn't mean you've failed.
But we need to notice when fear starts guiding our lives.
Fear Often Wants Certainty
Fear usually wants a guarantee more than anything else.
Tell me this will work.
Tell me I won't get hurt.
Tell me they won't reject me.
Tell me I'll have enough.
Tell me my health will improve.
Tell me my family will be okay.
Tell me I'm making the right decision.
Tell me exactly what happens next.
That's the only time I feel ready to move forward.
But life rarely gives us guarantees.
Faith works the same way.
Faith asks us to trust God even when we don't know how things will turn out.
This can be hard, because sometimes we aren't really asking God for guidance.
Instead, we're asking Him for certainty.
But those two things aren't always the same.
God might show us just enough to take the next step, without showing us how everything will turn out.
And that's where trust comes in.
Courage Doesn't Require Fear to Leave First
Many of us think of courage as being without fear.
But often, the bravest things we do happen when we are still afraid.
You might have a tough conversation even though your heart is racing.
You might walk into the doctor's office even if you're scared of what you might hear.
You might apply for a new opportunity even if you're unsure you're qualified.
You might set a boundary even while worrying about how someone will react.
You might start over, even if you remember how things went before.
You might trust God even when you still have questions.
Courage does not always look like this:
"I'm not afraid."
Sometimes, courage sounds more like this:
"I am afraid, and I am still going to do what I know is right."
Psalm 56:3 shows us a similar process:
When I am afraid, I put my trust in You.
First, fear is recognized.
Then, a choice is made.
Sometimes Fear Is Trying to Protect Us
Fear isn't always something we need to fight.
Sometimes, fear warns us about real danger.
It can signal that we need to pay attention.
It might be telling us to slow down.
Or maybe it is urging us to move away.
Sometimes, it means we should get help.
Or it could be reminding us to use good judgment.
We do not need to ignore every feeling of fear.
Instead, we can start by asking ourselves:
What is this fear trying to tell me?
Is there a real danger I need to address?
Or is my fear just a reaction to uncertainty, a past experience, rejection, change, or something I cannot control?
Wisdom helps us tell the difference between a warning that needs action and fear that only holds us back.
Sometimes, fear keeps us safe from harm.
Other times, fear stops us from growing.
Knowing the difference matters.
Everyday Obstacles
Catastrophizing
A single worry can quickly turn into imagining the worst possible outcome.
We do more than just wonder if something will be hard.
Our minds create a whole disaster movie, complete with casting and production.
Past Experiences
If something painful happened before, we often assume it will happen again.
Our past experiences can make us wiser, but they do not let us predict every future outcome.
Fear of Failure
Sometimes we would rather not try at all than risk finding out something might not work.
But if we avoid failure, we might also miss out on growth.
Fear of Other People's Opinions
We might know what we want or need to do, but we get caught up worrying about how others will react.
Waiting to Feel Brave
We often tell ourselves we will act once the fear is gone.
And sometimes, that means we end up waiting a long time.
Faith-Based Solutions
Name the Fear
Instead of saying:
"I'm just afraid."
Try to be specific about what you are feeling.
I'm afraid I'll fail.
I'm afraid I'll be rejected.
I'm afraid something will happen to someone I love.
I'm afraid I'll make the wrong decision.
I'm afraid I won't recover from another disappointment.
When we name our fears, we can look at them more closely instead of letting them take over.
Ask Whether the Fear Is True
Fear often makes things sound extreme or final:
This will never work.
Everybody will judge me.
I'll never recover.
Everything is going to fall apart.
Ask:
Is that actually true—or is that what I'm afraid might happen?
These are not the same.
Bring the Fear to God
Psalm 56 doesn't tell us to pretend fear isn't there.
Instead, it shows us where we can bring our fears.
You can pray:
"God, this is what I'm afraid of. Help me see clearly. Give me wisdom where I need wisdom, courage where I need courage, and peace with what I cannot control."
Choose the Next Faithful Response
You do not need to overcome every fear right now.
Ask:
What would I do next if fear weren't making this decision for me?
Sometimes the answer will be to move.
Sometimes it will be to wait.
Sometimes it will be to ask for help.
Sometimes it will be to establish a boundary.
Faith doesn't always mean moving forward.
It means letting God, not fear, guide how you respond.
Becoming in Action
Name your fear. Look at it closely. Decide what to do next.
This week, pick one fear that has been on your mind more than you'd like.
Write:
I am afraid that ____________________.
Then ask yourself three questions:
1. What is true?
Try to tell the difference between what you know for sure and what you might just be imagining.
2. What is mine to do?
Think about whether you need to take action, have a conversation, set a boundary, say a prayer, or make a decision.
3. What do I need to trust God with?
Notice which parts of the situation are beyond your control.
To wrap up, say this:
"Fear may be present, but it does not have to be in charge."
You can notice your fear without letting it take control.
Reflect & Journal
Which fear has been shaping my choices recently?
What does that fear make me believe will happen?
Am I afraid because of real danger, uncertainty, or something from my past?
What have I put off while waiting for the fear to stop?
In what areas might God be asking me to trust Him even when I do not know the outcome?
How might things be different if I listened to my fear but did not let it make my decisions?
You Can Be Afraid and Still Trust God
Life will always have things that scare us.
Some things are simply unpredictable.
Some people are beyond our control.
Sometimes, changes happen that we never asked for.
There are risks we just can't get rid of.
Having faith doesn't mean we stop being human.
But fear doesn't have to make our decisions.
We can admit when we're afraid.
We can look at it more closely.
We can choose to respond wisely.
We can bring our fears to God.
Then we get to decide who leads us.
David didn't say this:
"If I am afraid..."
Instead, he said:
"When I am afraid, I put my trust in You."
Maybe that's all we need for today.
You don't have to promise yourself that you'll never feel afraid again.
You can just decide this:
When fear shows up, I know where to take it.
Continue the Conversation
Last week, we talked about finding quiet for our anxious hearts and learning how to be still, even when our minds are busy.
This week, we focused on noticing our fears without letting them take over.
Next week, we'll talk about another emotion that can be even harder to admit, especially for women of faith:
Making space for our anger
Anger isn't always something we need to hide, ignore, or feel ashamed about.
Sometimes, anger shows us that something matters, something hurts, or something needs our care. The real question is how we respond.
Until then, keep this in mind:
Fear might still be there.
But faith can be there too.
And fear doesn't have to lead the way.
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